Hi Elizabeth.
I don’t even know how to say this…I’ve been searching for the right words, and there are none. Callie passed away just last Thursday, around noon at the vet’s. I can’t even talk about it without crying…but I will try to explain…
I remember asking you about flea and tick stuff for her. Well, I was going to spend 4 days taking care of my little grand daughter 7 weeks ago. Callie had a couple fleas fall off with each bath…and I tried to do just the Wondercide shampoo, and apple cider vinegar, but I would still find a couple fleas in the tub, and she was starting to bite herself.
I didn’t want to take the chance of bringing ANY fleas into my son’s home, so I ordered some topical, although I hated the thought of the chemical on her skin. It never came, and I was running out of time. So I went to my vet and the only thing they were selling was Bravecto. I asked 3 times if it was safe. 3 times. And I was told it was perfectly fine for dogs. I remembered you saying you didn’t like the oral, and there was that little voice in me too, but I had to do something, so I followed my vet’s advice and gave her that pill.
She was very sick immediately after…not vomiting yet, but she became unresponsive for about 10 minutes, and I was going out of my mind. I called the Emergency vet, and they said they had no experience with Bravecto. (by now, she had come around) They told me to call my vet first thing in the morning and to also call Merck, the drug company.
I did, and they were able to take Callie in later that morning. In the meantime, I called Merck and spoke to one of their vets. He sympathized and agreed it sounded like an adverse event from the drug, but said they had never seen that before. I have since found out that was a lie. Anyway, I got a case number from them, and when I called the FDA to report it, I got a case number from them as well…along with another from the Animal Poison Control.
As the days went on, Callie began to get sick with vomiting, diarrhea, lethargy…she was just not the dog I knew and loved so very much. She had good days and I would get so hopeful that we had turned the corner, that she was coming out of it, but the next day symptoms would return. It was a roller coaster.
My vet did everything she could think of. That first day, Callie was put on IV fluids to help flush it out. We did all sorts of tests…blood tests were completely normal. Liver and kidney function, normal. Nothing could account for her symptoms. She also agreed it was that damn pill, and put her on different medications to help her symptoms while trying to get to the root of the whole thing. I also saw a holistic vet. I was told to give her a liver detox to help flush that stuff out.
Nothing helped for long. I never told you because I was hoping we could beat it and I would not have to tell you your beautiful pup was sick. I took her to a specialist..an internal medicine vet, just last Wednesday, who wanted to do all sorts of neurological tests on Callie along with more GI tests. By now she had gone from 45 lbs to 37 lbs. She began to not eat, I tried everything, anything, just to get her to eat…all she wanted was to drink and drink.
We were scheduled to go back to the specialist on Monday to begin the tests, but early Thursday morning, she began to vomit a lot of blood and had an awful lot of bloody diarrhea. She was crying now, and I could not let it continue. I promised her I would not let her hurt, but she was now and we went to the vet. She did another X-ray, and another CBC, Xray was negative, but this time her white blood cell count was very elevated. She had been on several courses of antibiotics, had no fever, so once again, the vet was stumped. I think she wanted to keep trying more things with Callie, but the life had gone out of that darling dog’s eyes, and she was pleading with me.
I made the decision, Liz, to spare her the pain, and had the vet give her the injection that ended her life. I held her face in my hands, kissing her and just kept telling her how sorry I was…I blame myself, and I will never forgive myself even though I gave it to her on my vet’s advice. I should have researched more, I should have listened to my little voice.
I am so very sorry I have to write this to you, but I felt you must know. As I write tears are pouring down, as they have been for days now. I can’t function, can’t do anything but wish I could go back in time and never give her that pill.
I am taking full responsibility. She was under my care…she depended on me to keep her safe…and no matter how much I loved her, how much of a bond we had, how much we did together, I let her down. I failed her. I failed you. And I will never forgive myself.
I don’t know how I will go on without her…we really did everything together. She was flying through her training…she was the smartest, most beautiful, most intuitive girl I have ever had the privilege of loving. We slept together every night, she helped me more than I can possibly explain, and I let her down. I can’t imagine what the days will be like without her. I don’t want to know what life is going to be like now.
Liz, since this happened, there have been times when I can’t even breathe. I have a difficult time swallowing, and I am getting panic attacks. And I deserve every single awful moment I go through. I truly don’t know how I will go on. My family is very worried about me. They knew what Callie meant to me. They knew I loved her with all of my heart.
I don’t know what more I can say, except apologize again. I never meant to hurt her…I loved her….and I am so very sorry.
If you want me to, I can give you the name and number of my vet so you could talk to her, to verify everything I am saying. She would call me several times a week in the evening just to check on her. She said this was the dog she could not stop thinking about, the dog that kept her up at night.
Every single person who met her, loved her. And now my darling girl is gone.
I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I felt I had to tell you the truth of what happened. Please tell all of your new puppy owners to stay away from Bravecto. It will be my mission to get it taken off the market. Already there are quite a large number of people who have recently lost a dog to this awful stuff, and there are many more who are very sick, with some just clinging to life.
I’m so sorry Liz, Barb
These were of happier times, about a month ago…
